Riding Trains In Denmark

Dear friends!

While you are wisely starting to plan your journeys in detail, we are beginning to be gripped by a certain excitement. Will we get our sofa covers and lamps in order in time? Is it possible to build a champagne tower out of champagne flutes? (Gut feeling says no). Is it really lame to only have female singers on the play list? Phew! We better get cracking!

Meanwhile, here is the Train Knowledge:

There are normally trains between Copenhagen and Århus at least once an hour. You can buy a ticket from a ticket counter or a machine. The machines usually, but do not always, accept foreign credit cards. ("Credit cards" in this case also includes debit card that say VISA or MasterCard). It has never worked when I've needed it, but if you have a printer you should also be able to pre-purchase a ticket online at www.dsb.dk (the vital functions are available in English).

There are two classes, "standard" and "first class" (sometimes known as "business"). In first class, the seats are little bit nicer and you'll be served coffee, apples and a something sweet. But as Standard is almost as comfortable and quite as clean, there is really no need to splurge unless you are physically ill or ridiculously wealthy.

Regardless of class, you will find an electrical outlet above each window seat, convenient for plugging in your laptop or phone. (Britons will need an adapter). All seats have a table. The trains are not equipped with Wi-Fi.

There is one very good reason to brave the queue and buy your ticket at the counter and not from the machine. On top of the ticket price, which will be around DKK 311 one way, you will at the counter be offered a "place ticket" or assigned "seat". It costs DKK 20 and is totally worth it – especially if you're a pair or group and want to be sure to be seated together.

IF YOU ARE ARRIVING ON FRIDAY AFTERNOON/EVENING when commuter traffic peaks we strongly recommend pre-booking a ticket and a seat. Sitting on the floor for four hours sucks ass.

When choosing a seat you have the option of picking one in the silent area (the sales person might, in Danglish, refer to this as the "still zone"). In the silent compartments, you're not allowed to talk or use noisy equipment such as phones. If you are planning a nap, I strongly recommend going for this option.

Commuters might stamp their own tickets on the platform, but don't mind about that – once the train is moving, the conductor will come around to validate your ticket. If after an hour you haven't seen the bistro carriage, the train is probably too full for it to move around. Ask the conductor where it is and walk to it instead – you'll be able to buy chocolate, sandwiches, beer, and maybe sausages (cash only).

NB! Within the train cars, Danish trains have doors that are meant to be automatic. Some of them don't seem to be working at all. The sensor is just above the door, where the two halves meet in the middle. If you stand in front of a door and it does not open, you're not being an idiot – it's the sensor that's not working properly. Just lift one arm and wave your hand close to the sensor. You'll look silly but this is what everyone does.